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Plunket to say sorry

Gambling-MonkeyCelebrity mouth and trousers Sean Plunket has announced he will say sorry. Speaking on his behalf, personal assistant Wanda Nadderwunshawn told WWNews that Mr Plunket had recognised the error of his ways.

“The Seanster is aware not everyone speaks as many languages as he does,” she told WWNews on condition we stop asking why all the photos of Rush Limbaugh had been turned to the wall. “And from now on, to keep things even simpler, he’ll stop saying ‘whaka piu’ which is, as everyone knows, Maori for sorry and use the English word instead.”

Ms Nadderwunshawn say she didn’t expect the change to make much difference to Mr Plunket’s on-air ratings, as “it’s not a word people tune in expecting to hear anyway”.

Meanwhile New Zealand co-owner John Keys has said that comments by the woman at the centre of the current twittersphere debate, Eleanor Catton, are totally incorrect. In a series of instagrams Mr Keys denied that New Zealand is dominated by “neo-liberal, profit obsessed, very shallow, very money-hungry politicians who do not care about culture.”

“There are one or two Greens we haven’t manage to turn yet,” he winked.

To the weather now and rain is expected in most districts today. But then again, so is a fair deal at Harvey Norman.

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