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Kingmaker Peters outlines coalition demands, reveals key policies

As the National and Act parties enter the first week of an expected three year period of negotiations with Winston Peters over who gets the silver ashtray at the Cabinet table, the man once described as “hopefully that’s the last we’ll ever see of him” has already started to position himself and his party’s policies, but him first.

The country is well-accustomed to Peters assuming the Kingmaker role but, despite that, New Zealanders have never opted to vote for a republic, instead preferring to wait for the day when he gets up close and verbal with a reporter and gets a microphone accidentally shoved right up his left nostril. [Editor’s note: WWNews would never advocate for violence towards an elected offical, but would pay to see that.]

Peters has repeatedly declined to give details on which of NZFirst’s policies would have to get implemented in order for him to join a coalition with National and Act, or indeed details of any NZFirst policies at all, telling members of the media they should get on with the job of reporting important matters and leave the running on the country to him and Shane Jones, but him first.

Shane Jones wasn’t approached for comment as his penchant for the overutilisation of grandiloquent and fustian circumlocution makes Mrs Malaprop seem positively Churchillian, and who got time for that?

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